Five Keys to Raising a Hypocrite

1. Never admit you blew it. If you sin, cover your tracks before your kids see it. The important thing about mistakes is not that you make them, but to make sure that no one knows. "What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas." Another way is to let time go by because doesn't time erase hurt? For example, when you hurt your child's feelings by not keeping your word, take them for ice cream and distract them for a few days. This way you won't have to confess your faults.

2. Focus on appearances. Any kind of talk about your feelings or their heart will only confuse them. Keep the chat at surface level always. Make sure your comments about their behavior include lots of phrases like, "What will the neighbors say?" Or, "What will your friends at church think about you?" Make a big deal out of bad words instead of silly trivial things like evil input through horror flicks. Don't worry about your Bible staying in your car until next Sunday or what you post on Facebook. They will understand that your life at church and your life on Facebook are two different things. Go ballistic over tattoos on their arm and never ask about God's Word on their heart. Remember tattoos are for life! One more thing: it's more important to keep their room clean than their mind clean. Remember focus on appearance only.

3. Pray louder and longer at church. It's important to let your kids hear you pray at church. Use a lot of spiritual words and phrases like, "Lord, we adore You. Manifest Yourself among us." Or quote long verses when you pray so that your kids will be impressed with that verse you learned in Sunday School. Make sure you go longer than anyone else in the prayer circle. Longer and louder prayers will impress everyone and most of all, your child, if they are within hearing distance.

4. Talk about prayer in the schools and the 10 commandments in politics. Don't worry about praying at home. It's more important that they do those things at school. It's no big deal that the Ten Commandments are never mentioned or posted in your home. But it is important that we vote to keep them in the Town Hall. In the White House, but not in your house, that's the way!

5. When all else fails, change churches or move. When people get too close to you, they will begin to see your flaws. You want to protect that from happening. Accountability is over-rated. Faith is a private thing. Keep it that way. When people get too close to you, lose those friends. If you have to, you can always move to another church where no one knows you and you can keep your distance.

There are many more things I could tell you but these are five sure ways to nurture the hypocrite in your child.

Perspectives on Aurora

After the tragedy in Aurora, we've been inundated with news commentary: Who was Holmes? What makes a graduate student like him snap? Is it time for gun-control? Who were the victims? And some of it is heart-wrenching--the loss of life, the new normal for the Holmes' family. It's right to pause and reflect. But it's also right to keep perspective. While we are shocked over the loss of 12 lives in a theater as well as the others whose lives will never be the same, we should also consider:

On the same day of the Aurora tragedy, 

• ~3,700 babies were aborted in the U.S. (73% mothers report religious affiliation) Source
• ~435 Christians died for their faith (Average based on World Christian data)
• ~100 people committed suicide (Third leading cause of death in ages 15-24) Source 

Perspective changes as we think about these. What's the common need in all these things? Hope.  Let's be the purveyors of hope: hope for the Moms who feel trapped, hope for those contemplating suicide, and eternal hope for those who are suffering today for their faith.

Make Sure You Can Go Home

It's hard to watch the stories from Colorado--what once were houses full of life and love are nothing but ashes. What they are learning even through the tragedy, however, is that the most important things in life are not things, but people, memories and relationships.

Are you living in a way that you will always have a home? I'm not talking about a house, but a home.

Just about every week, I'm hearing another story from a guy who realizes too late he has the wrong priorities. It was his career, his sports league, his hobby or his ministry. Then he wonders why his kids don't want to hang with him when he's at "Sunnyside Retirement Center."

Or a Mom, who is all about the house, the decor, or the kids and their dance recitals. Then the kids grow up and she looks at the husband she has neglected and says, "Who are you?" She has no home. Only an empty house with a great color scheme and a silent partner.

Wayne Cordeiro writes:

"Learning the difference between a concern and a responsibility may save your ministry, your family, and your sanity...One day after years of ministry with a wonderful congregation, I will say my good-byes, pack my bags and, with many tears, walk out of the church. But when I walk out of the church, there’s only one place I can walk into. Family. If you miss building that home base, you will have nowhere to go when your ministry days are over. You’ll arrive back on your doorstep with your boxes of books and notes, and you’ll have nothing to walk into – except shards of yesterday’s mistake of putting your job, ministry, or career ahead of everything else." (Leading on Empty, 140)

The Christ-follower must lead like this: 

1. Jesus first

2. My spouse second

3. My kids third

4. Everything else (including me)

Do that so you can always have a home.